The end of summer, I feel, is drawing nearer and I feel as if this past spring and present summer has fleeted so fast, seemingly like sun sets too quickly across the beautiful horizon during that perfect moment with a loved one... eric and i have been here all summer and have had fun and done things and made memories but i can't help but feel some inner part of me wonder if... i have seen and done all i need and can do this summer while in alaska for my first time, ya know? i want to go kayaking again, hike a steep mountain side, go running across the wilderness & trails (without the fear of being attacked of course as a girl by herself), go down town to the nearest homeless shelter and volunteer for hours on end... and lastly, go to the bay and oceanside and see my first beach sunset in real life with the dirt and lil sand beneath my toes, reminding me of the sheer simplicity of nature and all that it represents, even bearing witness of God, Himself...
Alas, though, we've no car and the several (families) of us share about 2 cars or so and the rare blue moons that I see one for personal use i can't help but want to aimlessly wander off some road to the alaskan wilderness in hopes of seeing that one last group of 'moosen' haha (i call em that~ sounds so much better than just plain moose) and somehow get lost in the simplicity and peace of it all...
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I will be returning to Utah (Provo/ Orem), though, in a few weeks, 10 days later than planned and I can't help but feel torn between deeply missing Eric, my wonderful and sweet husband, and Alaska in all its beauty (and being able to finally explore it more and with transportation haha)... and the constant yearning I always have to return to Utah, what I have always and always will consider my true 'home'. My longing for utah sunsets over the mountains, long runs across the city meeting the most amazing yet humble people or 'hobos' (what crude name man labels them as), the memories that linger through the breeze as it blows through my crazy huge wavy long hair, and the feel of the history of my family's past (my mom's side) calling me from deep within the mountains up through the canyon and into peowia and heber city and coalville...
either way though... i am going to try and read more books even now every day and continue to run my heart out and record songs that i have been writing daily and make the most of the time i have left up here in this beautiful, and yet somehow wonderfully neglected by the technological and more city-like hands of man corner of the earth that has so settled upon the new inner reachings of my heart this summer <3



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